Governmentium (Gv), atomic mass: 312 - ModernCamaro.com - 5th Generation Camaro Enthusiasts
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post #1 of 7 Old 10-18-2010, 06:11 PM Thread Starter
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Governmentium (Gv), atomic mass: 312

Quote:
Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet
known to science.

The new element , Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it
an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of leptonlike particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.

However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which
it comes into contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally
take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years.

It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentiumís mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe
that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium
(symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium,
since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

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post #2 of 7 Old 10-18-2010, 07:28 PM
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Why does this make sense?

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post #3 of 7 Old 10-19-2010, 07:40 AM
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One of the most accurate analogies of government I've seen yet!!
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post #4 of 7 Old 10-19-2010, 01:38 PM
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Amen.....



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post #5 of 7 Old 10-19-2010, 02:47 PM
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Frequent exposure is sure to cause irritability, frustration and loss of funds.
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post #6 of 7 Old 10-20-2010, 11:58 AM
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However, when Governmentium goes through a half life it becomes Assinine. Assinine is very similar to Xenon 135 in that abosrbs all input and steadily reduces output to near zero. Assinine also has a short half life. This creates a deadly scenario in which Assinine has a reduced ouput to the point of failure just in time for its halflife to happen. When it happens, Assinine breaks down into KJR 321 and anti-KJR 123. These KJR's are similar to matter and anti-matter and when the two combine, the amount of IQ-1984 unleashed is 6.02x10^23 moles worth of peons. The fallout from a KJR/anti-KJR reaction is massive and it takes decades to decontaminate the affected parties.

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post #7 of 7 Old 10-29-2010, 07:19 PM
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